I decided to not post this on my family board...I'm not sure why but I don't want everyone up in my business if you know what I mean. I really have been struggling for the past eight years gaining some confidence is the parenting arena. I really have been struggling with some issuses with my self confidence and trying really hard to figure out myself. Any time you want to deal with issuses that are not fun it sucks. I really sucks. I have really great kids that act prefect 100% of the time at school but at home it's a compeletely different story. Ummm...I wonder who has the problem. It's ME! I know...it's earth shattering. I have done a good job teaching them morals and standards. I love them way too much and give them too much stuff. I'm not a very discpline person and will run off into a million different directions. Well, life's hard...especially when your hubby tells you that his tried of hearing you on the phone at work complaining about the kids not listening to me. Ya...let's be honest. I wouldn't listen to myself either. Empty threats...I know don't work. I know all of these things. I have read and study the subject. My hubby has told me a million times over that I have to make the kids listen to me. I really don't know for sure what's the issue per see by I'm getting closer to resloving the issue.
So, today...things could of gone really bad. I even called my hubs two times but luckily he didn't answer the phone. I really had to dig deep and have the self control to handle the situation. Instead of blowing my top and losing control. I stayed focused, I look my child into his eyes, I was firm, and he knew I meant business. I decided to not let him perform for me anymore. I will not be his audience when he doesn't get his way. I even went as far as to lock myself in my room and igorne him. It worked...a few minutes later I opened the door and he was sitting on his time out chair.
I feel really good. The kids completely trashed the house and I was able to get them all to help clean up the huge mess. It's not completed done but I'm happy about the progess they did make.
I'm going to be open again...I'm really afraid to confront my kiddos. I have no idea why but I'm always afraid to tell them "no". I'm not sure if it's because I'm worried they will hate me or not love me. I really don't know...I need to keep working on this.
So...I had a really good day.
I was in control of myself, I was confident...and the kids knew I meant business.
I didn't know yell at them.
I didn't give up and sulk and complain about being a bad mom.
The kids will come to respecting me and knowing where the boundaries are at.
I have to know what I want from them first before they will know how to behave.
Like I said my kids are wonderful and special.
I think the biggest issue is that I haven't be consistent and have sent them mixed messages in who's in charge.
No, Landon you are not in charge. It's me!
I'm really hoping for the best...it's only going to get better.
Plus, we have sat down for dinner for two nights in a row and read scriptures at the dinner room table.
Everything is going smoothly. Hopefully, I didn't jinx myself.
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